Looking for Complex Blended Family Harmony? Start at the top:)

One sure fire thing I have learned is that our best chances of having blended family bliss is when my husband and I are feeling like total BFF's.  Sounds cheesy but it is so true!  To make this happen we find ourselves needing to do several things. 

1. Be sure to create some time every night just for one another.  Time to talk, work out issues, put to sleep for the night ongoing issues, cuddle and other activities we find fulfilling.  Once we agreed on the importance of this time it took some time to establish it, several months, maybe a year, but we did do it.  I can really count on this time.
2. We need to take full advantage of the hour and a half we have to ourselves each evening.  That means rarely watching  t.v. or doing other chores (bills, laundry, dishes) after 9:00pm.  You can probably guess what my house looks like.
3. When we have a disagreement about how to parent, spend money or complete chores we have a policy to react with kindness, not anger or sarcasm.  This isn't always accomplished but I would say, yes mostly.  Take a moment to process the anger, don't play the blame game, put yourself in your partners shoes and remind yourself of your commitment to work together.

When my partner and I are getting along well, our children feel it.  Our children feel it and we are united in a common goal to find harmony.  When co-parents leave us rushing for emergency child care or creating some sort of crisis.  When one or more kid begins acting out, we are more prepared to work together and respond with loving guidance.  It can be done.  Good luck to you and yours.